Someone to Relate to
by Hulio
Summary: Because sometimes, through all your pain and sorrow, you need someone who understands, someone who can relate to what you're going through. rated T just to be safe.


Sirius glanced around the Head's common room upon entry, he shrugged finding the room deserted and turned towards the portrait hole, debating whether it was worth it to run all the way back up to Gryffindor tower to look at the map to find out where James, Remus and Peter disappeared too. However he stopped abruptly in his tracks upon hearing a failed attempt from the upstairs dormitories of silent weeping. He questioned whether it was ghost, although quickly abandoned the idea, realizing he was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time. Nervous building up inside of him, Sirius frantically ran towards the portrait hole to poked his head out into the corridor, praying to himself that he would see James or Remus running down the hall towards him. Both boys, in his opinion, were much better suitors to deal with crying girls especially a crying Lily. Shaking his head in disbelief at what he was about to do, Sirius turned on the spot and started up the staircase towards her room.

Unsure of whether or not it would be appropriate to just enter her room, he knocked quietly. Straining to hear Lily's whisper of a response on the other side of the door, muttering about her inability to come to the door, although at this rate Sirius was not going to simply leave her now. He reasoned with himself that the two of them had become come closer, with all the time he spent in the Head's common room and with all the time Lily spent with the Marauders.

Suddenly, he felt his palms get sweaty as he grasped the door nob, it wasn't like he had never been inside a girls dormitory before as Hogwarts most hansom seventh year he had been in more girl's dorms then he can count. Although, for some strange reason in which he could not seem to find an answer too, he was very frightened of what was waiting him on the other side of the door.

Taking a deep breath, Sirius went against everything he believed in and he turned the nob, opening the unlocked door. His eyes widened at the sight, Lily Evan's room was a complete disaster and at once he knew that something was wrong. Lily Evan's, the most tidy and organized girl he had ever met would never live in a place in such a state if she was in her right mind. From the sight of the dorm, it was obvious to even the most oblivious of people that she was not in her right mind.

Being careful not to step on any of the objects scattered across the ground, Sirius quickly made his way across the room towards Lily, sitting down next to her. "If you're looking for James, he, Remus and Peter went looking for you a while ago" she whispered through her tears.

"They'll find me eventually" he stated, gazing at her as she tried to hide her face in her hands, "Lily, is everything alright?"

She nodded then stood, keeping her back to him "Oh yes, everything's fine" she replied putting on a fake voice, however it faltered as she noticed the state of her room "Look at this place! It's a terrible mess in here!"

Without another word Lily started to frantically clean, waving her wand in all different directions, causing the objects to fly back into their rightful places. Sirius watched, absolutely stunned having never seen any sort of magic like the spells she was preforming. He quickly got over it, shook out of his trance and stood, following her to the middle of the room, skilfully ducking the objects that flew around the room.

"Lily" he stated, coming up behind her and putting a hand on her wand to stop her from casting spells "Obviously everything is not fine, please," he begged "Tell me what's wrong"

She shook her head, gazing at him through tear stained eyes, "You wouldn't want to hear it" she whispered "You wouldn't understand"

He smirked, grabbing her hand "Try me"

She sank to the floor once more and put her head it her hands, for a moment Sirius thought she was about to break down and start sobbing once more, he momentarily debated about making a run for it. Although he was stopped by an iritating voice inside his head that sounded suspiciously like Remus' which convinced him otherwise to place a comforting hand upon her shoulder and say.

After a few minutes of silence she finally let out a sigh and spoke once more, "If you must know," she muttered "Read the letter on the desk"

He nodded, leaving silent Lily alone on one side of the room as he marched over to her desk. _Read the letter on the desk,_ he repeated in his mind, although that was much more complicated then it seemed. Upon her desk, he noticed, were dozens of letters, some little, some big, some unopened, some torn in half, others torn into millions of pieces. All of them seemed to be addressed to the same person, Petunia, a name in which Sirius recognized from hearing Lily mention it in the past, a name that belonged to Lily's sister. Unsure of what letter she meant, he grabbed the oddest one that he could spot and looked inside of the already opened letter. It was heavier than he had originally assumed it to be, much heavier. Inside he could spot a broken piece of something and a small piece of parchment, he reached in slowly, and carefully taking the letter.

_Don't call me Tuney._

_Get this through your thick skull, I don't want to hear from you, I don't want to receive an owl with a letter nor do I want to receive it the normal way, I don't want to ever see you again. You are no sister of mine._

Sirius flipped the page over, hoping that there was more to the letter; however the other side remained blank. Slightly disappointed, he set the letter down and eyed the others scattered across the desk, knowing exactly what they would say without even having to read them.

"The locket" he jumped upon hearing Lily's voice, having momentarily forgotten she was still there "In the envelope, was hers, a gift from me on her tenth birthday. I had saved every sickle for seven months to buy her that" Sirius saw another tear slide down her cheek and as he peered into the envelope once more to take a better look, noticing that the broken pieces resembled those of a locket that had been smashed into various pieces. A feeling inside Sirius told him that it hadn't been the owl that had caused that much damage to the necklace, that Petunia must have destroyed it before sending the letter off.

He recognized the type of rejection and without hesitation he rushed to Lily's side, swinging an arm around her shoulder. Quiet sobs shook her body as he rubbed comforting circles on her back. "What did I do to deserve this?" he heard Lily ask him "We used to be so close, and then once I found out I was a witch everything changed"

"You don't deserve this" he stated

"Why did I have to be so different?" she whispered, burring her head into his chest.

"Lils, listen to me, it's our differences that make us who we are. Some people might think you're wrong to stand out, but it's who we are, it's the Gryffindor blood flowing through us" he responded "And you might think that I have no idea what you're going through, but trust me on this Lily, I know exactly how you feel"

"How?" she asked, it was such a simply question although it didn't occur to her how loaded of a question it was.

Sirius remained silent for a few moments, before taking a deep breath and proceeded to tell his tale for the first time, "My parents, the purebloods that they were, went about thinking they were better than any other wizarding family and drilled this idea that muggleborns were below us into my brother's and my head. I realize that I might have believed them at some point or another but the moment I was able to think for myself I knew they were wrong. It was that moment when this all started. I remember defending muggle-borns one night at dinner, I was only seven or so, my father and mother were furious."

Lily stared at him through her puffy, blood shot, emerald eyes in concern, though he shrugged it off and continued "They acted differently towards me from then on, they ignored me and pulled their wands on me on various occasions, they were down right _gits_. Then when I got my letter to Hogwarts and got sorted into Gryffindor, they in someways dissowned me as their own. Though they never gave up hope that I would realize they were right and join their precious Voldemort in his quest to rid the wizarding world of muggle-borns all together."

Lily remained strong at the mention of the lords name, and she relaxed into his chest as he went on "It wasn't until the beginning of last summer when I finally lost it, my own brother who had witnessed what my parents had done to me when I rebelled oh so many times, he was afraid to do it himself. Too much of a mama's boy, he eventually agreed to join the death eater's."

Silence hung in the air for what felt like an eternity, "My parents were so proud of him," he spat, "But I was furious and I didn't just sit there and take it. I yelled, I screamed, I threw anything that I could get my hands and even drew my wand at my parents. Although as I searched my brain for the worst spell I could throw their way, I was hit by one of my mother's and my father was quick to joined in."

"Sirius-" Lily began, although he ignored her, afraid that if he stopped he would never be able to continue.

"They tortured me that night, it was so painful that I could feel myself dying and they would've killed me, they would've killed me and enjoyed it. The worst part was that I was ready to let them, but then I thought of my mates, of James and Remus and Peter, of you and Marlene, and I got out. I don't remember how, but I did. The pain stopped momentarily and I took my chance in those few seconds and I ran, right out the door, right to James' house."

There were now tears trickling down Sirius cheeks, and he looked down at Lily to see a new sadness in her eyes, not for her but for him. "They didn't like that I was different, Lils, they didn't like that I wanted different things. All summer I tried to be strong, act like I didn't care what my family thought of me, but no matter how horrible they were, they were my parents. What haunts me to this day is the look of disgust and horror on their faces as he watched me rage."

"I'll eventually grow to live with those looks, but what I'll never get used too is having my brother hate me. Not a day goes by where I don't think about him, but he despises me to this very day, just as your sister hates you but in a completely different reason."

Lily hugged Sirius tightly, and wiped away the tears on his face, "We can't change the past, and I can't give you advice on what to do either because I've yet to figure it out for myself. Though I told you before and I'll tell you again, it's our differences that make us who we are. It's my differences and people like you that keep me going. You're a wonderfully talented witch, the brightest of our age, you're kind and loving, and your sister is making the biggest mistake of her life letting someone like you go."

She sniffled, thanking him. "You're a beautiful person, Sirius. You never fail to amaze me. I'm glad you stood up to them, because they're wrong. Your parents group us together and because of our _dirty_ blood we don't deserve to live, but as you continue to prove to everyone you meet, you are not parents, you are not family. You're different, you shine.

He smiled down at her, feeling her yawn into his chest. "I've never told anyone that" he finally admitted "I didn't want people to know, I didn't think I had enough courage to retell that story."

"Thank you Sirius" she repeated, standing from his side and walking over to her bed "You know, sometimes it's okay to be weak in the end it only makes you stronger, right?"

He stood and walked towards the door, a small smile creepy onto his face. He considered her last statement and she thanked him once again, "It was no problem" he responded as she crawled into bed "If you ever need someone to talk to, I might not give the best advice, but someone to simply relate to. Well, you can always come to me"

Her eyes were now closed but he could tell she was still listening "And although he might not understand, you can always go to James because trust me, he's trying. He is really trying."

He saw her smile slightly as she drifted off to sleep, "Goodnight, Lils" he whispered and with that he closed the door. Descending the staircase into once again, an empty common room.

Sirius settled himself on the sofa in front of the fire and in no time flat, deciding that his mates would eventually return to the Head's common room to find him. As he waited his eyes lids became heavier and heavier, he closed them _only for a moment,_ he reasoned with himself. It was only moments later that he had fallen asleep, a small smile on his face.

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><p><strong>Thanks for reading. :) <strong>


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